When Kirstin and I first met, I never imagined how deeply she would impact my life. From our very first date, something about her captivated me. It was her confidence, the way she spoke with such conviction about her beliefs and values, and her unwavering commitment to growth. Her warmth and authenticity made me feel like I had known her forever, yet her strength and depth intrigued me, leaving me wanting to know more. What began as a casual dinner quickly turned into one of the deepest conversations I’ve ever had. We shared our thoughts on a book that had profoundly influenced both of us: Changes That Heal by Dr. Henry Cloud. At first, Kirstin didn’t quite believe me when I said I’d read it—after all, it’s not every day you meet a man who dives into personal growth books. But as we discussed its lessons on healing, boundaries, and growth, it became clear we shared something special: a commitment to self-improvement and a faith-driven approach to life.

A Seed of Hope

That evening planted a seed of hope in my heart. As our connection deepened, I realized she wasn’t just someone I could imagine a future with—she was someone I wanted to build a life alongside. Kirstin and I both carried the scars of past heartbreak, each of us having walked through the pain of divorce. Those experiences left us raw, stripped down to the core of who we were. But instead of being defeated by them, we chose to rebuild, learning hard lessons along the way. Our past failures taught us what we didn’t want in a relationship and, more importantly, what we did.

Blending Lives, Blending Families

Blending our lives together hasn’t been without its challenges. We’ve had to navigate different parenting styles, from deciding how to split responsibilities for bedtime routines to finding a balance in discipline that respects each other’s approaches. One compromise that worked well was creating a shared family calendar to align schedules and manage expectations, ensuring everyone’s needs are met. These small but intentional steps have helped us bridge the gaps and create a harmonious environment amidst the inevitable chaos.

With all boys under one roof, our home is often a whirlwind of energy, sibling rivalries, and endless debates over who gets the last cookie or the prime spot on the couch. But amidst the chaos, there’s been magic—seeing the boys laugh together, call each other “brothers,” and create new traditions reminds us that love and effort can forge a beautifully blended family.

A Dance of Redemption

One moment that stands out is our first dance on New Year’s Eve. As the music played and I took Kirstin’s hand, it felt like the world around us disappeared. The cheers and chatter faded into the background, leaving just the two of us. In that moment, I was overwhelmed by the realization of how far we’d both come. We’d shed old mindsets, behaviors, and fears, stepping into the people we were always meant to be.

That dance was more than a celebration of the New Year; it was a celebration of redemption and healing. In that moment, I felt the weight of our past struggles lift, replaced by an overwhelming sense of peace and renewal. It was as though every heartache, every tear, and every difficult decision had led us to this one beautiful point—a testament to God’s ability to transform pain into purpose and brokenness into beauty.

Facing the Past, Building the Future

But not every moment has been picture-perfect. This past Christmas Eve, we cried ourselves to sleep, overwhelmed by memories of the families we once had and the lives we thought we’d be living. Yet, in that raw and vulnerable moment, we found something powerful. We realized that by sharing our deepest pains and fears, we were building a foundation of trust and understanding. It was a moment that reminded us we’re not alone in our struggles—we have each other to lean on, no matter how heavy the burden feels.

As we shared our pain, I saw Kirstin not just as the strong, resilient woman I admire, but as a human being who had faced devastation and risen above it. Her courage humbles me. Her strength inspires me. And in her, I see a reflection of my own journey through loss and renewal. Together, we’ve learned to lean into each other, carrying our burdens as one.

Preparing for Marriage with Intention

As we prepare for marriage, we’ve approached it with intention and commitment, knowing it’s both a beautiful adventure and a serious responsibility. We’ve sought wisdom from mentors, books, and our couples counselor, who has helped us unpack the deep wounds and triggers that surface in any meaningful relationship. We’ve learned to face conflict with humility, to communicate openly about everything from household chores to future dreams, and to love each other in ways that resonate most deeply.

Love That Challenges and Transforms

Kirstin has challenged me in ways I never expected. She’s pushed me to grow, to let go of control, and to embrace the messy, raw, and beautifully imperfect nature of real love. For so long, I chased comfort and avoided discomfort because it felt safe. But with Kirstin, I’ve learned that love isn’t meant to be easy. It’s meant to challenge you, to wake you up, and to teach you to love fearlessly.

A Journey of Transformation

This journey with Kirstin has been one of transformation, healing, and hope. Together, we’re building a life rooted in love, faith, and unwavering support. One example of how our shared faith has influenced our relationship is the time we committed to praying together every morning. Starting our day with gratitude and shared devotion has deepened our connection and reminded us to center our lives on God’s guidance, even during challenging times.

It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it. As we step into this next chapter, I’m grateful for every moment that brought us here—the struggles, the growth, and the love that makes us stronger together. Kirstin, you’ve shown me that life can be better than I ever imagined, and for that, I’ll keep dancing with you forever.